Mugalomaniac.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

Sports for Muggers

we at mugalo has decided that although mugging is of utmost importance to our lives, we must not neglect the very important factor of keeping fit so that the body will be in the tip top shape to mug. so here is a simple muggers' guide to exercising. enjoy!

TableRunning
this sport is not for those afraid of heights and is best done when there is a row of tables for you to run on. after a hard long time of mugging, relieve stress and loosen up those tight muscles by getting up on the table and running on the table tops! jump over the gaps, run and sprint to your hearts' contend! just do not fall off. it would proof disastrous. schools are the best place to do this but remember, do it only at night when no one is around! dont risk getting caught my dear fellow muggers!

LeadRace
as the name suggest, it has to do with your mechanical pencil lead. reload your pencils with a brand new lead and at the count of three, start pushing the pencil like no one's business! the way to cheat in this is to use shaker pencils. the former trains your fingers and the latter, your arms. very good for writing long lengthy essays and highly recommended for arts students with around 17 essays for A levels, each around 4 pages long. dont use sharpening pencils though. nothing will happen.

PageFlipping
yupz! this is fro training your reflex and hand eye cooperation - very good for comprehension. what you do is just flip a thick book from page one to the very last page without flipping more than one page per time. if you flip more than a page, you will have to start from the beginning again and the time will not be reset. good luck! =)

SpeedReading
go online and print out a paragraph of scientific journal full of complicated and long words. get a stopwatch and time yourself the time you take to read the paragraph. then get your mugging partner read it. the winner will get to decide the next location to mug. haha! be a good sport alright? agree to whatever that place is. =)

ForwardHandToss
now what is this you ask. let me tell you. first, drain a disposable cup of its content of coffee or milo or tea or whatever it contained, or finish a packet of snacks. then, crumple up the ex-food container and aim for the nearest rubbish bin. throw. this high skill takes time to hone and months to perfect, yo must estimate the distance of the rubbish bin away from you, calculate the optimum velocity, estimate the optimum strength, calculate when to release the rubbish........ it trains the arm so that it is stronger and can last through more essays. take a break, get your mugging food together and have an aiming competition with your mugging buddies! it is guaranteed to give you people a lot of fun!

and the best of all...
MutualMassage (or MM. no. not MM Lee)
come on man, sitting in one position for so long does give you muscle ache. why not put your mugging materials down and give each other a nice comfortable massage? it relxes the body and sooths the mind. i guarantee you it will increase efficiency level by at least 50%. =)

yupz! so there they are my fellow muggers!have fun mugging! but remember, your body is important too! take care!

Lecture delivered at 10:44 PM by taky